Understanding and Addressing Potty Training Regression:
A Guide for Parents
When your child has seemingly perfected potty training, it can feel like a massive victory for any parent! But just as you think you’re well on your way to no more nappies, an accident happens. This can be frustrating and confusing, but is actually entirely normal, and even has a name. This is commonly known as potty training regression. In this article, we’ll explore why this regression happens, as well as how you can deal with it when it does.
Why Does Potty Training Regression Happen?
Potty training regression is either when your child stops using their potty or begins to have accidents again. Your child might also verbally request to use nappies and they may even want to be held more during this time.
Potty training regression typically happens during the toddler years but can also affect older children between the ages of four and six years old.
There are a few potential reasons for potty training regression, but before we get into those, it’s important to rule out any potential medical issues such as a UTI or constipation with a medical professional. Following this, you may want to consider any changes in routine, or events that have recently occurred in your and your child’s life. These stressors can often play a role in your child’s regression. For example:
- Your child was not developmentally ready to be potty trained initially
- Illness or physiological change
- A death of a loved one
- A new sibling
- Family conflict
- Moving house
- Change of school
- A new babysitter
5 Tips for Dealing with Potty Training Regression
- Identify and Communicate
Identifying the root cause is often the first step in supporting your child to get back on track. If age appropriate, sensitively talk to your child about why these ‘accidents’ might be happening. Maybe use some books about potty training like I Want My Potty by Tony Ross to make it a non-judgmental conversation.
If you identify that they’re feeling upset about the arrival of a new sibling, for example, try to set some time aside for the two of you. This isn’t always easy as a parent of multiple children, but even if it’s having a one-on-one breakfast together, or sharing a bedtime story, while the new baby is sleeping, these can provide moments of special, quality time.
If your child attends a nursery, perhaps its them who’ve noticed your child’s regression. It’s important to communicate with both your child and the nursery team to identify any potential changes, such as a transition to a new room or routine. By understanding these changes, you can work together to find solutions and support your child.
- Offer Praise for Using the Potty
When your child attempts to, or successfully uses, the potty, it’s important to offer plenty of praise. As you know, immediate and enthusiastic praise helps them make a clear connection between their actions and your positive reaction, reinforcing this desired behaviour. Be specific about what they did right, by saying, “Great job telling me you needed to use the potty!” This helps them understand exactly what they’re being praised for, so they’re able repeat the action again.
Consistency is key here, so try and offer praise every time they use the potty to help reinforce the behaviour and therefore make it a habit. It’s important to also use praise in other areas of their development, such as when they’re playing kindly with friends or siblings.
- Minimal Zips and Buttons
A practical tip to help with potty training regression is ensuring your child’s clothing has minimal zips and buttons, where possible. Clothing that is easy to get on and off can make it much easier for your child to quickly and independently use the potty, potentially reducing the likelihood of accidents caused by struggling with fastenings.
- Manage Expectations
Remember, if your child is experiencing a regression due to any of the reasons listed above, be patient and allow time for adjustment. It’s important to manage your expectations and understand that getting your child back to using their potty as they were before might not happen overnight. Sometimes you may have to go right back to the beginning and move at your child’s pace.
The way children learn is not linear, and this includes potty training. Try not to compare them to their siblings or peers. Every child is unique and individual. Plus, they are also learning many other things alongside their potty training, which may be why their potty training has taken a back seat.
Many potty-training regressions typically last a few days to a few weeks, so you can expect your child to soon be back to where they were! Again, if you have any concerns about their regression, or this appears to have lasted longer than a few weeks, contact a medical professional as there may be an underlying medical reason for this.
- Keep Calm
Finally, try and keep calm when an accident occurs (as difficult as that can be at times)! Reminding yourself that this is only a minor setback, and that both you and your child are doing your best. Regressions are normal because growing up requires a lot of information processing. Taking a couple of moments aside during stressful times can work wonders during potty-training (and other) regressions. Stepping outside or into another room for a quick breather can help you to gather your calm and regulate your response to the situation.
